We Have Met the Enemy
And It is Us.
After more than a hundred years of modern business experience, thousands of books and courses on how to be an effective manager, and countless aphorisms about various ways to be a productive supervisor…40% or more of employees HATE their boss.
Bosses, the people who are entrusted to manage employees effectively, are the #1 reason why people quit their job.
And bosses themselves typically don’t last long on the job, most departing in less than 18 months.
So, what’s up with this?
Why, with all that we know, are bosses such colossal failures?
Human beings may know what to do to be effective…they just don’t do it. They let their insecurities, personality flaws, idiosyncrasies, greed, ambition, and sometimes sociopathic behavior sabotage their performance.
It’s no wonder that companies worldwide are turning to automation and robotics to get the job done. At least machines don’t f*#k things up for reasons that are often incomprehensible.
People, with all their inherent flaws, just can’t compete any longer. They are fast becoming obsolete as machines become more effective and efficient.
Soon machines will take over nearly every human endeavor…from planting and picking crops to self-driving cars to running entire business departments. And their artificial intelligence will do it without backstabbing, screw ups after a night of binge drinking or lack of knowledge.
Machines have got it all over humans.
There’s no need to try to “fit the culture” if you’re a machine.
Machines don’t suffer from psychotic behavior.
Machines are dependable. You tell them to do something and they do it without whining or procrastinating.
40-hour work weeks are no problem for machines. Hell, 120-hour work weeks don’t faze them. A few minutes a month of servicing (if it doesn’t do it automatically) and they’re good to go.
If conditions change there’s no long re-training process, just a software upgrade.
Employees can’t bitch about how “stupid” their boss’ decisions are when the boss is functioning on sophisticated artificial intelligence instead of Neanderthal mode.
And a machine doesn’t fall asleep on the job…or not show up because of a hard night out on the town.
Machines don’t ask for more money or (God forbid) benefits.
They don’t get pregnant at awkward times.
Machines don’t care if you’re black or white or Muslim or Christian or Jewish or atheist or female or older/younger or disabled or fat or balding.
Machines don’t drink to excess, take illegal drugs, get arrested for stupid things or become addicted.
Machines don’t do things one way one day and another way the next.
Machines don’t smile at you and then stab you in the back.
Machines don’t “wake up on the wrong side of the bed.”
Machines don’t do any of these things.
But humans do.
Once artificial intelligence is perfected so that machines can be creative, we’re pretty much doomed to menial crap jobs.
Like serving up burgers at McDonald’s. Oh wait, they’re testing fully automated McDonald’s in Europe.
Well, how about brick-laying? Surely machines can’t do that. What? There’s already a machine doing that…better and faster than humans?
OK, what about menial housework? Never mind the floors, the Roomba will take care of that. We’ll still need people to pick up the dog doo-doo. What? Someone is working on a Poomba?
OK, what about those highway construction workers who hold signs or stand around doing nothing at taxpayers’ expense? Thankfully, there will still be government jobs.
The last refuge for humans may well be Congress, which has shown remarkable aptitude for total ineffectiveness, yet still manages to stay employed.
So, all is not lost. Just almost all.
It’s predicted that automation and robots will replace tens of millions of jobs currently held by defective human beings in the next couple of decades. It’s said that this will lead to a new era of productivity far beyond the humble gains that overworked humans have achieved in the past 25 years. You see, in the future it won’t matter much how good you are at your job if you’re not perfect at all times…like a machine.
And humans are far from perfect.
The lucky humans will be hired at near slave wages to build and service the machines. The truly fortunate few will earn handsome fees (everyone being a contract employee in the near future) to design the machines that will replace humans.
Most of the rest of humanity will either have to beg for scraps or (if socialism becomes the norm), lounge around dabbling with hobbies and work on their yoga poses.
The 1% will have even more than they already have now to make their lives magnificently magnificent, as the pool of available serfs to do their bidding will be enormous. They’ll even be able to afford beautiful sex robots, which will put trophy wives out of business (no huge divorce settlements, fading looks, and undependable sex). What? They’re working on a male sex robot? OMG! Maybe we’ll all just watch the robots do what we would like to do. Humans are already moving toward a mostly voyeuristic society, where we watch instead of do.
Of course, there could be some kind of Orwellian uprising where humans take claw hammers and axes to destroy the machines they created that have destroyed their lives. But who know just how smart these artificially intelligent machines will get. They may band together and create ways to fight back, essentially ridding the earth of pesky humans.
And this may be a good thing…for the earth that is…since we’ve done a great job of one thing…screwing it up.